The week of tests ended Thursday with a breast MRI. The tight space wasn't so bad, thankfully I was facing down, so it didn't really bother me. Then the noises begin and WOW! I am not sure that anything could have prepared me for that.
These were just a few of the thoughts running through my head:
It started with,
*Is the machine malfunctioning?
*Am I still going to be in Chapel Hill when this turns off?
*What is this doing to my body and my brain?
*Really, somebody thought I might be able to fall asleep in here?!?!?
Then once it stopped a few times and the noises changed, I knew I wasn't on the moon, so I tried to make a grocery list in my head and plan meals for the weekend. I even thought I was finished when the tech walked back into the room, but she was just putting something else in my IV. Here come the noises again and the longer I stayed in there, the more the machine started talking to me, just like my breast pump used to in the middle of the night! I know some of you understand this! The same sounds over and over, finally starts to sound like it's saying a word or phrase to you! I know, CRAZY, but finally it was over and although I felt like I vibrated for several hours afterwards, I survived it!
After a drive through campus and a tasty supper at Elmo's Diner in Carrboro (with my favorite date), I think I was more convinced than ever before that UNC is the place to BE!
Everyone is different, everyone's breast cancer diagnosis is different, everyone's treatment plan is different, everyone's side effects are different and for those differences, I am THANKFUL! Many ladies have walked this road before me and have done it with amazing grace and style and although everyone's path may have looked different, the ONE thing that matters is that they reached the other side of this a SURVIVOR!
My journey to become a survivor begins today, Monday, March 12, 2012.
The song that seems to be playing in my head this morning, is from Third Day:
Part of "Mountain of God"
"Even though the journey's long
And I know the road is hard
Well, the One who's gone before me
He will help me carry on
After all that I've been through
Now I realize the truth
That I must go through the valley
To stand upon the mountain of God"
I love this post, Suzanne! A little funny, a little of your heart and a lot of FAITH! Press on!
ReplyDeleteAs you begin this journey, just know that we are here holding you up in prayer and are here for anything you need--anything. Mom and Dad
ReplyDeleteI was sent your link via email to read. I am a 7 year breast cancer SURVIVOR and have an 8 year old son. He was only 15 months at the time I was diagnoased. I can truly relate to the experiences that you have posted. It brings tears and laughter as I recall some of those same moments. My wonderful Oncologist "Dr. E" told me at my very first visit that my faith and attitude would get me through. He handed me a Bible from his office counter as asked me to look up Isiah 41:10 and I did... "Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
ReplyDeleteJust wanted you to know that you are not alone (but I can tell that you already know that). I am sending lots of prayers up for you and will be cheering you on! Susan G
They say a sense of humor is medicine for the soul. Praying that your soul and your "boobs" stay well connected during this ordeal - because, you dear girl, have the soul of a survivor! I love Suzanne!
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